Tuesday 28 April 2009

Attack of the Dreaded Virus(es)



I was calmly going about my own computer business yesterday when this McAfee dialog box popped open warning me that a drive was infected. Now I've been skittish ever since some stupid virus attacked my computer a few weeks ago because of which the computer sorta died and had to be brought back to life after a lot of worrying and basically I was just cut off from the online world for a couple of weeks. So naturally I freaked out. Ran a virus scan on the infected drive. Sat back and watched McAfee detect a total of 406 viruses. In one drive. I didn't freak out. I just (calmly) wondered how the computer hadn't exploded with so many viruses in it!

Then came the dealing with the viruses part. For some reason they refused to be cleaned. Just wanted to be zapped into oblivion. And either I can't understand McAfee or it can't understand me because I ended up deleting all 406 viruses manually. One by one by freakin one. I'm sure it has something to do with adjusting the settings and me being technologically challenged; but I'm still blaming McAfee! After all AVG didn't give me this much trouble. Of course my computer died on AVG's watch so it can't get too cocky either.

I really think there's some sort of conspiracy going on. The computer working against me on McAfee's orders. How else do you explain 406 viruses and me having to delete virtually everything? I won't be surprised if McAfee is trying to conquer the world, one computer at a time. If it's evil enough to make me delete every one one the 406 viruses individually, it's evil enough to harbour ambitions of world domination.

Sunday 26 April 2009

MTV Roadies Finale : Really? That's It?

I just finished watching the finale a while back and it was so ... disappointing. Barely any excitement. Absolutely no entertainment. At one point me and my friend actually looked at each other and said "This is boring!" And that's not a good thing for the Roadies finale to be.

All in all, this entire season was kinda depressing. Lame tasks, a ridiculous assortment of contestants (with the exception of Sufi *drool*) and not really worth the Roadie hype. Now last season was a different story. All the contestants were completely entertaining albeit crazy bitchy. But bitchiness is fun so eh well. The only entertainment provided by the Roadies this time around was in the form of Samrat and the weird constipated sounds he made on a regular basis and Paulomi who stood out in all her Paulomi-ness.

Last season's finale had everyone glued to the TV. It was fun, squirm-inducing and thrilling. This time? Lameness redefined. At first I refused to believe that the finale could actually be so dull. I kept looking out for that sudden twist which would turn the game on its head. Waited and waited until I finally realized - this was it. The grand finale. The lamest, most scripted end in the history of the show. I could easily predict the winner two minutes into the final task. Not that I'm doubting the amount of strength and stamina needed to complete the task; it's just that I can't bring myself to care. The mere difficulty of a task isn't enough - the finale needs entertainment value too! And as much as everyone tried to play up the actual content by hyping it up to be really tough and great; it wasn't. It was STUPID.

What happened to you Roadies? You used to be cool. Remember the ladyboy task thing of last season? Remember the having-to-cover-your-nakedness-with-newspaper-and-a-stapler? What happened to your nipple piercing, iguana kissing, strip quizzing ways? I want to see some girls slapped. I want to see some heads shaved. What I do not want to be told is that James Bond once said "Roadies will be back." Because I very much doubt James Bond would have cared. So stop making stuff up, stop spending money on trips to Australia and just concentrate on getting out of the pit you've dug yourself into.

Monday 20 April 2009

"I'm gonna make that audience rock!" - Susan Boyle

I know, I know it's a little too late to be jumping on the Susan Boyle bandwagon. But I just saw the video today and I was too blown away not to blog about it. So there.

So who exactly is Susan Boyle? For all those who've been living under a rock, let me enlighten you. Susan is a 47 year old contestant on the reality show "Britains Got Talent" who, by her own admission, has never been married, never been kissed and is currently unemployed. Take a quick look at her and you'll see a pleasantly plump matronly figure with eyebrows bushy enough to put Ashley Olsen to shame. Her ambition of being a professional singer as successful as Elaine Paige produced smirks and eye-rolls from the audience and judges alike. At the beginning of the video, you can make out how everybody's just waiting to pounce on her performance and laugh her off stage.

And then she starts to sing.

At that precise moment, if you listen hard enough, you can just about make out the noise of hundreds of jaws dropping simultaneously. You can see Simon's eyebrows shoot up, you can see Amanda Holden look gobsmacked and you can see Piers Morgan applaud enthusiastically and laugh at the audience's as well as his own assumption that just because Susan doesn't look like a teenage pop queen, all the smirks and eye-rolls were right on target. Because that's when everyone begins to realize that she can sing. Boy can she sing.

And that's around the time the audience starts cheering. Cheering and hooting and clapping and screaming. And as she continues singing, all the cheering and hooting and clapping and screaming just get louder. That's when you see all three judges becoming completely shocked speechless. That's when Piers tries to gulp down his astonishment, Amanda gives multiple standing ovations and Simon just smiles and sighs contentedly. And that's when you tell yourself "Shame on you for being so superficially judgemental."

What makes Susan Boyle so endearing is her humility and her complete lack of knowledge of the fact as to how stupendously talented she really is. She so cutely tries to walk off stage and equally cutely walks back on. And when she gets those three Yes-es from the judges, she is so genuinely surprised and delighted that you can't help but love her even more.

I really hope she wins, that one. And even if she doesn't, judging by all the media attention she's been getting alongwith her tag as the "biggest Youtube sensation"; not to forget her amazing voice - this isn't the last we've heard of Susan Boyle.

P.S. If you haven't watched the video yet, I will have nothing to do with you until you watch it here. Now! Shoo!