Thursday, 30 October 2008


While coming home today, I saw a poster in the local train which made me smile at the creator's imagination. It said "Instead of reading this, shouldn't you be checking under your seat for any unattended baggage?", and was sponsored by Idea. In the wake of these bomb blasts that are becoming alarmingly regular in the country, I thought that the company displayed an incredibly creative conscience. And I did check under my seat too. So hey, it's effective as well.

Tuesday, 28 October 2008

An Early Halloween

Earlier, I sat to write a post and as I opened my browser, I was visited by a not-so-furry visitor. Not as much visited as attacked. By a bat. Not the wooden one, but the one with large flapping wings. OK, not so much attacked as scared out of my wits, but let me tell you, it felt just as bad as attacked.

Here I was, typing away and pretty much minding my own business, when suddenly out of nowhere, a freaked out winged thing sat on the CPU. At first, I thought it was an extra large moth. I was startled but not alarmed. Then I saw the "moth" spread out its extra large black wings. Realization struck me. I chose to handle the situation in my usual calm, collected manner. I screamed like a banshee, threw open the window and ran out of the room, pulling the door shut behind me.

I didn't start hyperventilating. I didn't! Almost doesn't count. And even though I thought that the bat's wings might have brushed my shoulder, I resisted the urge to run into the shower. Also, for some reason, I thought it would be smart to take a stick and bang it around in the room-with-the-bat through the ventilator. I hoped to achieve nothing whatsoever by doing this, but it seemed smart at the time. Then I sat in the drawing room armed with my stick, as I waited for mom to get home and shoo the bat away. I decided to stay put and guard the room till my mom arrived. I only left when I went to try on my new shorts, which as it turns out aren't brown but grey. Apparently I was struck with temporary colourblindness in the store. And hey don't judge me just 'cause new things make me not hyperventilate. We all have our security blankets.

Anyway, my mom got home and checked the room but the bad had flown out (hopefully it isn't lurking anywhere in the corner. Ah! What was that brushing against my leg?). I'm proud I didn't freak out. Well not completely anyway. Come on, bats are scary! I scream like a little girl at the sight of a lizard. So how, how in the name of all things pink and chocolaty did Mother Nature expect me to cope with a bat? Heck, I can barely handle a cricket bat without it flying out of my hands ten seconds into the game! So yes, I was extremely brave given the circumstances. I was!

And the strangest part? The whole time I was guarding the-room-with-the-bat, all I kept thinking was how this would make a good blog post. Bloggers Anonymous much?

Satire, Sarcasm, Mockery = ♥

I found this amazingly hilarious website called Go Fug Yourself. Yes, a detailed explanation about the term "fug" can be found. It is basically a blog run by two girls who openly (sometimes subtly) make fun of certain fashion choices of celebrities. I know it's not nice to laugh at the fashion blunders of others and their comments border and tip toe their way on harsh but my god they're so funny that they'll make you laugh out loud (and/or snort out liquids that you might have foolishly been consuming while reading their posts). The site combines two of my favourite things - fashion and humourous writing plus it's a scathing laugh riot. Ha, fun!

Go check it out :-)

Ah, The Wonders Of Retail Therapy

Seriously you can never, ever go wrong with a bit of shopping to jazz up your life. I mean, what is life without shopping? Incredibly blah, that's what.

I bought my first pair of Converse sneakers today! Yes, yay! Remember how excited I was at the thought of owning a purple pair? Well, turns out, you don't really get the purple ones in India. But I got a nice olive green pair which is apparently called military green now. Eh. They kind of look like this. A shade darker, I think, white laces instead of military green and not so canvas-y and fluffy looking.

I also bought a couple of other things. Two pairs of plaid shorts to laze around the house, two pairs of jeans with which I'm in love, denim capris and brown shorts. I dragged my mom to so many places and she came without a fuss, for which I am eternally grateful. My mom's a smart one, she is. Usually when we're out shopping, I have to spend about 10 minutes convincing her how every little thing I have my eye on is a good investment. If I thought a particular nightwear item was adorable, her reaction would be "Why do you want to actually spend money on something you're never going to wear in public? Wear those (ratty old) clothes that you already have (which were new when I was 10)." Today, however we had decided a firm budget for me and not a rupee more. So when I spotted those cute little plaid shorts, this is how the conversation went:

Me: Ooh! Mom look! Those are soo cute! I want this one. Can I buy it? Please? Pretty please?

Mom: What is that for? [tone getting high pitched] Are you going to wear that outside? Look at how short it is!

Me: Mom, relax. It's for wearing at home. Can I buy a pair?

Mom: Oh. Yeah sure.

Me: [confused about which colour to pick] Which ones? Both are equally cute.

Mom: . . . .

Me: [all hesitant] Um... can I... uh... buyboththesepairs?

Mom: Sure.

Me: Really?! Thank you thank you thank you! Hey, wait a minute. You're only agreeing 'cause the money's coming out of my budget, right?

Mom: [grinning] Yup.

Anyway, by the time I got home, I had so many parcels in my hand (Mom insists on asking that each item be given in a separate bag. She really likes those bags. And free stuff). But I also like carrying all those bags 'cause it makes me feel like I've shopped a lot. Yes, I'm only slightly insane.

And even though I was so tired that I could have fallen asleep climbing up the stairs, and my feet were so sore that I was constantly hallucinating about a hot water foot bath, I was completely happy. Did I not tell you retail therapy works wonders?

P.S. New Converse! Yay-ness!

Monday, 27 October 2008

Apparently It's Diwali!

Well, Happy Diwali then. I can't believe I almost missed the first day of the holiday. I had no idea that it began today; not until I was very rudely awakened by the ghastly cracker cacophony at an unearthly hour this morning. Yeesh!

One thing I love about Diwali is that it is a brilliant excuse for me to splurge on shopping. Yeah, yeah, I know it's the festival of lights and the diyas and rangolis are really pretty and blah; but for me it'll always be the season de shopping! I'm not really a traditionalist when it comes to these things and hello, did I mention the shopping? Sure, the crackers are terribly annoying, but hey, there's nothing like a bit of retail therapy to brighten your mood.

Crackers. Aah. The bane of my happy Diwali existence. Everywhere you go these three (apparently four) days, every minute of the freakin' day, you just cannot escape the awful, awful noisy crackers. You have to be fully prepared to be awoken at a time no sane person should be up by the stupid, relentless noises that go on and on and on and on. And of course, if you're planning to catch up on your beauty sleep in the day or plan to tuck in early, fat chance mister. Did I not mention the relentlessness of the sounds? Even as I type, the crackers being burst below my building keep startling me. Argh!

And not only are these crackers slowly murdering the environment (air pollution and noise pollution), encouraging child labour, scaring innocent animals (not to mention humans. Those sounds send me into a cardiac arrest every single time), they are also just plain annoying. So, this Diwali, kids, say no to crackers and stop irritating the hell outta me. [/rant]

Sunday, 26 October 2008

Five People Whose Butts Himesh Kicks

This is a funny article I read in JAM yesterday. Some parts made me laugh out loud and be thankful that I wasn't drinking something. No plagiarism intended. I just wanna share what I really liked. The credit goes totally to Chirag Mahabal, a hilarious JAM writer and cartoonist. Enjoy :-)

P.S. You totally won't get it if you have no idea who Himesh Reshammiya is + you don't live in India (preferably Mumbai).

1. Santa Claus

You can love him(esh), or you can hate him(esh) but you can absolutely not ignore him(esh). How can you when every possible mode of transport known to man has him blaring on the speakers! He's taken hold of the rickshaws, the taxis, your car's stereo and now... even the buses! He's everywhere! So now Himesh knows when you're sleeping, Himesh knows when you're awake and Himesh knows if you've been good or bad so be good for Himesh's sake. Cab Santa even compete with that kind of influence? You only tell...

2. George Bush

So what if George Bush is the leader of the biggest superpower in the world? Does he have Himesh's cap? And does it really matter that the future of India's energy problem is in George Bush's hands? Does Bush have the ability to record 76,000 songs a day? George Bush has an entire staff of strategists and writers who spoon feed his speeches and his next steps to him. Himesh composes, writes, sings, acts in, decides the cinematography of, choreographs and decides the model that is going to act in his music video all my him(esh)self!

3. Muttiah Muralitharan

Ha! You think Muttiah Muralitharan has the unfair advantage of being able to bend and twist his arm to impossible degrees in order to spin the ball? Have you seen the extent to which Himesh twists his arm just to hold the microphone upside down? Imagine what he could do with a cricket ball! In a recently conducted survey, helpless infants and adolescent children were asked what scared them more - Murli's face when he released the spinning ball or Himesh's screaming new avatar in his latest film Karzzz. The results were overwhelming. Compared to Himesh's all teeth baring face, Murali looked like a story telling grandmother from England.

4. James Bond

So what if Bond has the coolest gadgets and the suave personality? Can he turn around asfastaslightning and scream out "Drop the gun I say... DROP THE GUN I SAY!"? So what if Bond has the cool Alfa Romeo in his latest movie? Can he summon a fleet of rickshaws to his help whenever he wants? Even if it is Europe or the Sudan Terrain? And so what if James Bond has the scantily clad women? Can he dance in weddings with teenage girls and still manage not to be called a paedophile? Abhi bol! Abhi BOL!

5. Michael Jackson

Wacko Jacko has his "Aaow!" But aapdo Himesss has his never ending, glass shattering, impossibly echoing "Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh!" You might have heard Michael Jackson's falsettos, but have you ever heard anything even remotely as nasal as Himesh's latest album? And Wacko Jacko achieved all his fame and fortune after changing his nose at least a hundred times. Himesh has sung all his superhit songs that have broken all the records WITH JUST ONE NOSE! In your reconstructed face, MJ!

Saturday, 25 October 2008

Airtel is amusing :D

I saw the new Airtel commerical promoting their voice SMS service today. And I thought it was really witty and cute. It has Saif Ali Khan, Shah Rukh Khan and Kareena Kapoor. It plays up the chemistry that Saif and SRK shared in Kal Ho Na Ho and it also cashes in on Saif and Kareena's relationship. The concept of the whole ad is really smart and not OTT and the person who thought of it should totally be appreciated. Charming :)

A Great Day :-)

Today started out normally enough. Had to go to college for our upcoming BMM fest meeting. Since I was early and I hate waiting, I was pretty happy to be spotted by some of my junior college classmates and began chatting happily. And when they asked me whether I'd seen Ranbir Kapoor in H.R. (i.e. the college next to mine), I obviously thought there was some amount of leg pulling going on. But when they convinced me by pointing out the vanity van, camera crew and the fact that they'd seen him themselves, I became a teensy bit excited.

Don't get me wrong. I live in Mumbai, so I have chanced upon the odd celebrity here and there. Minor ones, but celebrities nonetheless. However, this was different. The three Bollywood men I love with all my heart are Abhishek Bachchan, Ranbir Kapoor and Imran Khan. So OK, maybe teensy bit excited was an understatement. Hoping to catch a glimpse of him, I stood at the gate for 15 minutes. When people asked me why I was on guard duty instead of going inside, I squealed excitedly that I was waiting for Ranbir Kapoor. Yeah I'm a fangirl. So sue me. But apparently, I was the only one excited 'cause every other person kept laughing at me and called him gay. Stupid, stupid people.

Eventually I did manage to see him. For a little less than a minute. And I'm still ecstatic! The unit members were very hostile towards us though. They shooed us away thrice. After that my pride was wounded and I refused to go stare at him again. Oh and the make up artists had crowded around Ranbir, so I couldn't see anything besides his clothes anyway (green tee, blue jeans. Yes, fangirls are obsessive).

I'm totally excited. But frankly, I think he looks better on screen than he does in person. And he looked extremely grumpy. He wouldn't even glance at the adoring crowd that strained to catch a glimpse of him, which, I thought, was extremely rude. Is it too much to ask to just smile and wave at your fans? Fans, without whom, you wouldn't be as popular as you are? The attitude left me miffed and kind of lowered my love. But hey, there's always Abhishek, right?

Wednesday, 22 October 2008

If Wishes Were Horses...

Well, if wishes were horses, I'd have half a dozen stables full! My most recent obsession is owning a pair of Converse sneakers. Desperate, desperate obsession. And not any old pair from the lanes of Bandra; but the original shoes, which (according to the official Converse website) are only supplied to Planet Sports outlets in India. So Planet Sports it is. I still can't imagine shelling out 2k for a pair of shoes. Footwear for God's sake! But then again, this obsession has a life of its own. I stare at the Converse website so often, I would have made it my homepage if I didn't think it would have been the final nail in my coffin of insanity. Until about 15 minutes ago, all I wanted was a pair of red hi-top chucks. Then, introduced the whole new possibility of owning purple hi-top chucks! And I was hooked.

I am like a junkie and I want my drug. PurpleConverse PurpleConverse PurpleConverse PurpleConverse PurpleConverse. Hey, you never know; maybe if I say it enough, a pair of them will magically appear on my doorstep.

P.S. As long as my footwear related wishes are getting fulfilled, I wouldn't say no to a pair of these ballet flats I've been lusting after since this morning :)

Monday, 13 October 2008

And I'm Back!

Yes, yes I am. After nearly a three month disappearing act, I'm back in blogdom. What made me come back? Some big event taking a hold of my life? No, nothing quite that dramatic. I'm just here 'cause I have exams going on and I'm skilfully dodging the books. Plus I'm trying to convince myself that since I have my Computer exam tomorrow, sitting in front of a computer counts as studying. Well it should!

Anyway, I have nothing to write about personal events except that I hate exams and I hate having to pretend to be studying. I read something interesting in yesterday's issue of YA! paper (yes, I like reading children's' newspapers. So?). The cover story focused on some really spooky coincidences that have taken place throughout history and I thought some of them were pretty good. So here you go.

Seeing Double

A German mother who photographed her infant son in 1914 left the film to be developed at a store in Strasbourg. In those days some film plates were sold individually. World War I broke out and unable to return to Strasbourg, the woman gave up the picture for lost. Two years later, she bought a film plate in Frankfurt, over 100 miles away to take a picture of her newborn daughter. When developed, the film turned out to be a double exposure, with the picture of her daughter superimposed on the earlier picture of her son. Through some incredible twist of fate, her original film, never developed, had been mislabeled as unused, and had eventually been resold to her.

Childhood Book

While American novelist Anne Parrish was browsing bookstores in Paris in the 1920s, she came upon a book that was one of her childhood favourites - Jack Frost and Other Stories. She picked up the old book and showed it to her husband, telling him about the book she fondly remembered as a child. Her husband took the book, opened it, and on the flyleaf found the inscription "Anne Parrish, 209 N Weber Street, Colorado Springs." It was Anne's very own book.

Poe Puzzle

In the 19th century, the famous horror writer, Edgar Allan Poe, wrote a book called The Narrative of Arthur Gordon Pym. It was about four survivors of a shipwreck who were in an open boat for many days before they decided to kill and eat the cabin boy whose name was Richard Parker.
Some years later, in 1884, the yawl, Mignonette, foundered, with only four survivors, who were in an open boat for many days. Eventually the three senior members of the crew killed and ate the cabin boy. The name of the cabin boy was Richard Parker.

Taxi Trouble

In 1975, while riding a moped in Bermuda, a man was accidentally struck and killed by a taxi. One year later, this man's brother was killed in the very same way. In fact, he was riding the very same moped. And to stretch the odds even further, the very same taxi driven by the very same driver - and even carrying the very same passenger struck him!

Mirror Images

The twin brothers, Jim Lewis and Jim Springer, were separated at birth, adopted by different families. Unknown to each others, both families named the boys James. Both James grew up not knowing of the other, yet both sought law enforcement training, both had abilities in mechanical drawing and carpentry, and each had married women named Linda. Both had sons, one of whom was named James Alan and the other named James Allan. The twin brothers also divorced their wives and married other women - both named Betty. And they both owned dogs which they named Toy.

Crowning Glory

In Monza, Italy, King Umberto I, went to a small restaurant for dinner, accompanied by his aide-de-camp., General Emilio Ponzia-Vaglia. When the owner took King Umberto's order, the King noticed that he and the restaurant owner were virtual doubles, in face and in build. Both men began discussing the striking resemblance between each other and found many more similiarities.
1. Both men were born on the same day of the same year, March 14, 1844.
2. Both men had been born in the same town.
3. Both men married a woman with the same name, Margherita.
4. The restaurateur opened his restaurant on the same day that King Umberot was crowned King of Italy.
5. On July 29, 1900, King Umberto was informed that the restaurateur had died that day in a mysterious shooting accident, and as he expressed his regret, an anarchist in the crowd assassinated him

And finally...

Revenge Killing

IN 1883, Henry Ziegland broke off a relationship with his girlfriend who committed suicide. The girl's enraged brother hunted down Ziegland and shot him. Believing he had killed Ziegland, the brother then took his own life. However Ziegland had not been killed. The bullet had only grazed his face, lodging into a tree. It was a narrow escape. Years later, Ziegland decided to cut down the same tree, which still had the bullet in it. The huge tree seemed so formiddable that he decided to blow it up with dynamite. The explosion propelled the bullet into Ziegland's head, killing him.